Pixels

Pixels

Starring Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Michelle Monaghan, Peter Dinklage

Directed by Chris Columbus

The Story:
In 1982, video game nerds Brenner, Cooper, Ludlow and Eddie competed in a video game tournament, which was filmed and sent into space by NASA in hopes of communicating with an alien race.

In present day, Brenner (Adam Sandler) is now a low-level electronics installer, Cooper (Kevin James) is somehow the President of the United States, Ludlow (Josh Gad) is a conspiracy nut living in his grandmother's basement, and Eddie (Peter Dinklage) is in jail.

Then, the aliens that received the capsule - who mistake it for a declaration of war - attacks Guam based on the classic game Galaga, and Cooper enlists Brenner, Eddie, Ludlow and Lieutenant Colonel Violet Van Patten (Michelle Monaghan) - whom has a brief history with Brenner - to stop the incoming invasion.

As the aliens unleash attacks based on the classic games of the 80s, Brenner and his crew step up their own game in order to save the world, until their three lives are lost and its game over for the world.

The Synopsis:
I remember seeing the trailer and getting very excited.  As I saw the classic games of my childhood coming to life, I was all ready to pre-order tickets, and then I saw it.

Adam Sandler.

This was my reaction when I saw he was the lead in the film:

So I waited for the film to come to the second run theater before seeing it (seeing how it was critically and universally panned, I was relieved I didn't spend $9.00).

I finally saw it, and while it brought back warm nostalgic feelings, I couldn't shake the terrible casting choices. Chris Columbus directed some of the best films out there (the first two "Harry Potter" films, the first two "Home Alone" films, and "Mrs. Doubtfire" to name a few), so for him to resort to this lowbrow piece makes me wonder his choices. 

As I said, the film did bring some warm fuzzies for this video game nerd.  Arcades?  I remember those!  As Sandler put it, "Games you play in an arcade which was a building outside of your house. You would go there with your friends, listen to music, cute girls everywhere. In ancient times, they call it 'socializing.'"  Made me miss those old days of spending hours at the arcade putting quarters into the machines.  RIP arcades, and RIP Adam Sandler's career (although, to be fair, it's been dead since "Mr. Deeds").

So nostalgia aside, "Pixels" is a pretty awful film.  No character development, nothing outside the normal boundaries of a typical Sandler film (Sandler does his best when he's playing the classic everyman, Kevin James as the overweight funny guy, etc.), the only decent aspect of the film is the effects themselves, which seem out of place for such a plain film.

And Kevin James as the President?  I guess we found a President worse than Trump.

The Summary:
You want to see a good "Pixels" film?  Check out this short film that the actual film is based.  It takes all the great parts of the film and condenses it into a two minute masterpiece.

The Score: B