Worst2First: My Top Films of 2018 - #141 - #80

Worst2First: 

My Top Films of 2018 - #141 - #80

2018 was an up-and-down year for films, with some being tremendous hits while others fizzling out before they even got off the ground.  Thanks to programs like MoviePass (RIP) and Sinemia, I was able to see more movies in the theater than ever before, and I managed to see 141 movies that were released in 2018, and now I'm ranking them from worst to first, and splitting the blog up into two posts.  This first one will focus on #141 - #80, and there's a purpose for the colors you see:

RED = The worst, the ones I graded D+, D, or D-

YELLOW = Cautionary ones, films I wouldn't personally recommend but not as bad as the others, the ones I graded C+, C, or C-

BLUE = Average, films that I either wasn't particularly "wowed" by, or those I felt were rather lackluster, the ones I graded B+, B, or B-

GREEN = The better films I saw this year, but those that still missed the mark of greatness, the ones I graded A or A-

PURPLE =  Cinema royalty, the best of the best I saw this year, the ones I graded as an A+, ones that I personally would recommend to anyone

For this first part of the list, I only included the Red, Yellow, and Blue films.

Now these are my personal opinions, and of course everyone has their own views.  Obviously you won't agree with everything on my list, and I don't expect you to.  These are just my personal opinions.  Full reviews for each of these films can be found on my Archives site.

So I'll be kicking things off with #141 - #80!

 

Last year the worst film for me was "Wish Upon" and this year the distinction went to "Show Dogs," a family comedy that was neither family-friendly nor funny, with CGI that expired back in 2002, featuring a scene so disturbing that the production company pulled the movie to edit the scene out before re-introducing it.

 Christian movies are basically inherently bad, but "Samson" takes the cake as it becomes an almost unwatchable mess, a film that's only slightly better than the run-of-the-mill church plays you see every Christmas and Easter.

Featuring a Creepypasta that would've been more scary ten years ago when it actually WAS scary, the only thing frightening about "Slender Man" was the fact that people thought this would be a good idea to make.

A film that would've worked better if it were a Lifetime movie or a Hallmark Channel original, this is so generic and typical you'd be forgiven if you don't remember a thing about it.

The only positive thing I can say about this is that it finally serves as the conclusion of a trilogy, and we'll never have to see the forced relationship between Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson anymore.

The SyFy Channel called, and they want their film back.  How this made national distribution is beyond me, as even though the camp factor was heightened, it still wasn't enjoyable in the least.

You'd dare yourself to throw yourself off the roof of a house before admitting the truth that you actually watched this by-the-books generic "horror" movie.

The remake no one asked for, "Overboard" took its namesake too seriously and went overboard on everything - except the laughs.

Only slightly better than its predecessor (because this is something that could actually happen), the promising script was muddied by terrible performances and unlikable characters all around.

How can you make a film starring Gerard Butler as a submarine captain boring I'll never understand, but somehow they managed to do so here.

The real horror is the fact that human sex trafficking is real, and while this film tried to shed light on this almost unnoticed crime, it failed to really drive home any important meaning.

When you root for the bad guy because the supposed good guy is a complete D-bag, you've got story problems from the start.

Taking a beloved children's classic and making it more modern for the hip new generation should be paramount to a crime, as not even the decent CGI could save this film from becoming a pretentious, overly-long wannabe comedy that parents were forced to sit through.

When you have to make three movies to prove your point that "God's not dead," maybe you need to find a different way to convey your message.

This film robbed me of my time, and robbed the world of a decent telling of a classic literary hero.

Kevin Hart and Tiffany Haddish do their normal thing, both of which have become increasingly stale since both have been incredibly over-saturated in the market lately.

Taraji P. Henson deserves so much better than this typical, unmemorable action film.

Taraji P. Henson deserves so much better than this typical, unmemorable drama film.

Only the spirits can understand what would make Dame Helen Mirren appear in such a by-the-numbers horror film whose real-life story is much more terrifying and intriguing than this drivel.

2018 was the year of remakes that no one asked for, as no one asked for this violent, pointless film that glorified vigilante justice.

The setting was cool, but everything else lacked a strong human touch.

Proof that if you keep advertising a film with the name Peter Jackson doesn't always mean great results, as this was just a typical story with some admittingly beautiful CGI wrapped around it.

Not even Johnny Depp could save this from being one of the biggest animated clunkers of the year.

While the concept was fun, the acting had a lot to be desired, as the story of a girl falling in love with a spirit who transports itself to a different body every day could've been told so much better with a stronger cast.

"Jackass" ended years ago, it's time for Johnny Knoxville to realize that.

The next wannabe "Passion of the Christ" (it even had Jim Caviezel!), "Paul, Apostle of Christ" instead became a dull, mundane tale that took its source material and pretty much wove a whole new story from it.

George A. Romero would be turning over in his grave if he had to see how his legacy has been tarnished by such lackluster sequels.

I feel pretty sure Amy Schumer isn't funny.

The biggest disappointment this year for me, I was eagerly anticipating this film, but after seeing it, I was greatly let down due to a subpar performance by Steve Carell and a story that should've had me weeping, but instead I found myself yawning.

I honestly don't remember much about this, but I remember I was rather bored through most of it.

Not even the promising talent of the lead could save this from being an unforgettable, boring, drawn-out story.

The premise would've worked better as a short, but they dragged out the story so long it became unfunny, and that's before it became oddly serious and dramatic.

Another film that would be better suited for Lifetime, but at least it had some cool fight scenes.

I personally don't get the love for this film, as I found it rather humor-less and typical, with a sappy ending that didn't fit the rest of the film.

Charlize Theron was the saving grace in this otherwise dull action-comedy.

Better than I thought it would be, it was still hindered by the fact that it's based off the new "Teen Titans" series that caters to little kids instead of the more grown-up "Teen Titans" animated series that came out before.

Claire Foy gives it her all, but the edge given to Lisbeth Salander was depleted for a general action film with little to no character development.

Diane Keaton, Jane Fonda, Candice Bergen and Mary Steenburgen deserve so much more than this.

Another film I was disappointed in this year, "Kin" had everything to make it great, but instead became very dry and stale.

Clint Eastwood can typically do no wrong, and the idea of casting the real-life heroes to play themselves seemed like a risky gamble, but when you cast people who can't act in a movie where they're supposed to act, don't be surprised if you find that they can't, indeed, act.

While the story is emotional, the execution had a lot to be desired, but at least Helen Hunt tried to save it.

After ten long years of waiting, THIS is the sequel we got to the amazing "Strangers" film?  The only good thing in this film is the poolside fight.

Better than I thought it would be (since I don't follow basketball), I actually found myself laughing a few times throughout, and not due to the actual comedians cast, but rather the basketball players who hammed it up beautifully.

The cast was likable enough, and I found myself oddly drawn to the story and really invested in the characters in ways I didn't think I would be.

Unnecessary is the word here, but at least the visuals were lively, and Adam Sandler was contained to just his voice.

The first film was so well done, the franchise had nowhere to go but down, and that's what's happened with each subsequent sequel.  While it was scary enough, and Lin Shaye is always amazing, here's hoping this really is the "last" we'll see of the "Insidious" franchise.

Dwayne Johnson doing Dwayne Johnson things in a Dwayne Johnson film...with really big CGI animals.

At least the costumes and set designs were fun.  Keira Knightley's voice was so high-pitched I'm surprised dogs from around the block didn't hear her.

While the action was exciting, there wasn't much else there in this typical action film.

It's hard to be a middle film, but even harder when the middle film is just the second of a five-part movie franchise.  Even though it's wicked long, it didn't really seem to go anywhere or tell any real story.

This is just campy fun, and you can tell the actors knew what they were getting involved in, so it allowed us to actually just sit back and enjoy.

I'm a sucker for a good dog story, and Sgt. Stubby was one of the best dogs who ever lived.

Not AS bad as other people say, it's still a rather generic space monster story you've seen done better in so many other films.

Melissa McCarthy gives it the old college try, and sometimes lands some decent jokes, but more than not misses the mark.

Dwayne Johnson doing Dwayne Johnson things in a Dwayne Johnson film...with is pretty much a rip-off of "Die Hard" and "The Towering Inferno."

The story of Ted Kennedy and the young aide who died in his car one night should've been epic, but instead it was unmemorable and just decent at best.

We've been waiting a long time for a decent "Predator" sequel, and we'll just have to keep waiting a bit longer.

At first, the concept of a Purge was so outlandish it was laughable, but as the years go by, these films become more terrifying because it's becoming more and more likely to happen.

The long (very long) awaited finale to yet another YA-adapted film franchise, "The Death Cure" secured the death knell for all future YA-adapted films.

You have to hand it to Liam Neeson - he's somehow one of the biggest action stars out there at age 66 years old, but his adventures have become rather mundane and lackluster as of late.

Yet another huge disappointment, this had all the earmarks of being something stellar, but instead it was just a lavishly shot film that was derived from a book that no one believes could logically be made into a movie.

I was very excited for this, because I figured it'd really shed light on how we rely on social media and allow it to dictate our lives, but instead the film focused more on style over substance.

Stay tuned for the best films of 2018!