Major Theatrical Releases September 2016

Major Theatrical Releases September 2016

Welcome to the start of the fall film season, where superhero action flicks and movies featuring explosions are replaced with Oscar-caliber performances, true-life tales and uplifting stories of love - and also some animation, decades-old sequels and a unique filming experience. 

Here are the major theatrical movies being released in September 2016.
(Dates are subject to change)

September 2

Morgan

"Morgan" looks like a mixture of "Ex Machina" and "Splice," and once again delves into the idea that we as humans should never play God.  Here, it looks like a company has manufactured an artificially created human being with superpowers, and like any creation who feels trapped, rages against their captors.  Produced by Ridley Scott's ("Alien") production company and directed by his son Luke, this sci-fi film has some strong pedigree behind it, plus a stellar cast in front of the camera including Kate Mara ("Fantastic Four"), Toby Jones ("Captain America"), Michelle Yeoh ("Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon"), Jennifer Jason Leigh ("The Hateful Eight"), Paul Giamatti ("Sideways"), Brian Cox ("Red") and newcomer Anya Taylor-Joy - who got her big break in the horror gem "The Witch" - as the titular character.

The Light Between Oceans

Based on the best-selling book, "The Light Between Oceans" centers around a loving couple who loses their baby before its born, and then finds a baby washed ashore on a boat.  They raise the child as their own when they meet a woman who is the baby's real mother, who feared her child was lost at sea with her husband.  Do they reveal who the child really is, or keep it a secret?  This will undoubtedly bring some tears and tension, and boasts an A-list pedigree of talent, including Hollywood's newest "it" girl (and Oscar winner) Alicia Vikander ("Room"), Oscar nominee Michael Fassbender ("Steve Jobs") and Oscar winner Rachel Weisz ("The Constant Gardener").  This film also marked the beginning of real-life couple Fassbender and Vikander, so their passion will be more than just mere acting.

September 9

When the Bough Breaks

In this modern "The Hand That Rocks the Cradle," a young successful couple desire to have a child but are unable to do so, so they enlist a surrogate to carry their baby to term.  They feel like they owe the surrogate a lot and allows her to live with them, where she becomes infatuated with the husband.  You can pretty much predict everything that will happen here, including the ending, and even though it boasts a great cast including Morris Chestnut ("The Best Man") and Regina Hall ("Scary Movie"), it still looks like a mediocre film at best.

The Wild Life

After an amazing summer filled with animated animals ("Finding Dory," "The Secret Life of Pets," "Kubo and the Two Strings"), "The Wild Life" looks like it'll fall by the wayside as an overall droll film that tries to tell the story of Robinson Crusoe through the eyes of the animals on the island he lands on.  The film has absolutely no star power whatsoever, and just looks boring.

Sully

Oscar-winning director Clint Eastwood tells the tale of Captain Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger, who performed the impossible - landing a major airliner on the Hudson River without a single fatality.  Known as the "Miracle on the Hudson," this film goes behind the scenes and focuses on Sully's rise to fame, but also tackles scrutiny around the events of that fateful day.  Tom Hanks will easily earn an Oscar nomination for his role here, and it looks to be a rousing dramatic piece.

September 16

Blair Witch

I'm beginning to feel like a broken record, but then again Hollywood is making me do it.  Once again we're given a film decades after the original, but at least with this case it's an unnecessary remake instead of an unnecessary sequel.  Back in the late 90s, "The Blair Witch Project" became a blockbuster hit because it did something other films never did before, and introduced the world to the "found footage" subgenre.  Unfortunately, now that media has been over-saturated with this format, it's no longer new, fresh, or exciting, and it looks like this remake will offer nothing in the way that made the original such a groundbreaking success.

Snowden

There was Benedict Arnold, and today's most well-known traitor (or hero, depending on who you talk to) is Edward Snowden, a former NSA employee who leaked classified information that the government has been spying on Americans for decades, forcing him into exile.  It's no surprise that Oliver Stone tackled this true-life tale, as he's most known for being completely controversial, and there's no doubt this film will be talked about for weeks afterward.  Joseph Gordon-Levitt takes on the titular role, with a supporting cast including Shailene Woodley ("Divergent"), Melissa Leo ("The Fighter"), Zachary Quinto ("Star Trek"), Tom Wilkinson ("The Exorcism of Emily Rose") and Nicolas Cage ("National Treasure").

Bridget Jones's Baby

Darn you Hollywood, you're going to make me yet again make reference to decades old sequels long after people stopped caring about the original.  Such is the case here, where Renee Zellweger's now-Botox infused face returns as everyone's favorite writer Bridget Jones, this time taking on a Maury side-story as she becomes impregnated by one man, although she was with two different men at the same time (Colin Firth, obviously phoning it in, and Patrick Dempsey, who needs some work after "Grey's Anatomy").  The only way this film would be halfway decent is if it ends with the three of them on Maury Povich's stage, with him addressing the men as "you are NOT the father!"

Hillsong - Let Hope Rise

The Hillsong Church is a massive church in Australia that features one of the best worship teams in the world.  Their songs have been sung in churches all across the globe every week, and touched the hearts of millions.  This documentary will center on the group and how their songs have impacted the world for Jesus, as well as offer a unique worship experience in the theater.  In a time where negativity abounds, this is the film that will uplift your spirit.

September 23

The Magnificent Seven

Typically Westerns aren't a big box office draw, but this remake of the classic story of seven men coming together to protect a small town will unquestionably be a massive hit, especially since it boasts such amazing talent like Denzel Washington ("Training Day"), Chris Pratt ("Guardians of the Galaxy"), Ethan Hawke ("Boyhood") and Vincent D'Onofrio ("Full Metal Jacket"), some classic shoot-em-up action and a decent storyline.

Storks

 Forgetting that awful "The Wild Life" movie coming out earlier in the month, "Storks" looks to be a laugh-out-loud heartwarming story of a stork (who doesn't deliver babies anymore) and an orphan girl as they deliver an accidentally created baby to her new family.  The animation looks beautiful, the comedy is gut-busting, and the film includes some serious voice talent including Andy Samberg, Kelsey Grammer, Jennifer Aniston, Ty Burrell and newcomer Katie Crown.

Queen of Katwe

This true-story film centers around Phiona Mutesi, a young girl in a poor city in Uganda who falls in love with playing chess and becomes a Woman Candidate Master at the World Chess Olympiad.   This looks like an inspiring tale of an underdog who rose beyond her means to achieve her dreams, and features Oscar winner Lupita Nyong'o and newcomer Madina Nalwaga as Phiona.

September 30

Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

 Based on the offbeat children's novel by Ransom Riggs, "Miss Peregrine" centers around a young boy who loses his grandfather and comes across a school featuring peculiar children with different abilities.  He is destined to protect the home from invading enemies, and is directed by the ever-eccentric Tim Burton.  It looks promising, with dazzling effects, set pieces, and cast (including Eva Green, Asa Butterfield, Judi Dench, Samuel L. Jackson and Allison Janney), but some parallels could be made that this looks a lot like an "X-Men"-style film.  Hopefully it doesn't bomb as bad as "The BFG" earlier this year, and I don't think it will.

Masterminds

"Masterminds" was a film that was due to be released in August 2015, but due to a financial crisis with the studio, it was pushed back.  Typically that's never a good sign, and it looks like this is one of those films where we've seen the most funny moments in the trailer.  Even though it features some of today's greatest comedic talent, it also looks to be a bit boring and I can see Zach Galifianakis' accent to become grating after about ten minutes.

Deepwater Horizon

 Mark Wahlberg stars as Mike Williams, a man working aboard the oil rig Deepwater Horizon when it exploded in April 2010, resulting in the worst oil spill in U.S. history.  While the story seems harrowing and filled with excitement, it seems to me that it'll fall into the mediocre mode, not being amazing but not being terrible either. 

So there are the films being released in September 2016. 

Here is a list in order from what I think will be the best, to the worst.

The Magnificent Seven
Sully
Snowden
Storks
Morgan
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children
Queen of Katwe
The Light Between Oceans
Deepwater Horizon
Hillsong - Let Hope Rise
Blair Witch
Bridget Jones's Baby
Masterminds
When the Bough Breaks
The Wild Life