JoeMama's Movie Reviews

Imagine Me & You Starring Piper Perabo, Lena Headey, Matthew Goode, Darren Boyd Directed by Ol Parker If it wasn't for the lesbian theme in "Imagine Me & You," this would be one of those films you'd find on the Hallmark Channel (although I've heard they're branching out and including gay and lesbian love stories in the near future, but we'll see) - a film so sickingly sweet, so innocent in its indiscretions, so vanilla it might as well be an ice cream cone that you can't help but fall in love with all the characters involved, at least that's what was supposed to happen.  Instead it turned into a meandering tale of mediocrity, where every character is sympathetic, nice, and wholesome, and culminates in a totally unsurprising conclusion. Rachel (Piper Perabo) and Heck (Matthew Goode - seriously, his name is Heck...well, short for Hector, but everyone calls him Heck) have been lovebirds for years, and finally decide to tie the kno...

Guns Akimbo Starring Daniel Radcliffe, Samara Weaving, Natasha Liu Bordizzo, Ned Dennehy Directed by Jason Lei Howden It's no secret that today's day and age have been plagued by online trolls and cyber-bullying, two of the major downfalls in the technology age we live in now.  It's easy to be a "keyboard warrior" and to sit behind your computer and leave hateful, judgmental comments for the world to see and feel like you're a big man for doing it - but what happens when a real repercussion occurs for your fowl-mouthed comments?  For those on the receiving end you probably don't care too much about, but when it happens to you, you realize that your words have consequences, and sometimes you can't escape it. Miles (Daniel Radcliffe) is your typical 21st century guy - living in an apartment filled with action figures, working at a dead-end job where his boss is your typical bro-guy who picks on nerds, still pining for his ex-girlfriend (Nata...

Bloodshot Starring Vin Diesel, Eiza Gonzalez, Guy Pearce, Lamorne Morris Directed by David Wilson In the early 2000s, comic book film adaptations began hitting the big screen, with mixed results to say the least.  Now, when you look back at films like "Hulk," "Daredevil" and "Elektra," you wonder how they managed to keep the genre going long enough to craft the MCU.  "Bloodshot" falls into that category - a superhero comic book film that seems more suited for the early 2000s than 2020 in practically every sense of the word: it's bland, forgettable, simplistic, typical, and worst of all filled with laughably bad CGI. Ray Garrison (Vin Diesel) is a Marine who is captured and tortured, but then witnesses his wife's murder before he himself is killed by Martin Axe (Toby Kebbell), and is brought back to life by a shady organization known as Rising Spirit Tech led by Dr. Emil Harting (Guy Pearce).  Garrison has been injected with n...