JoeMama's Movie Reviews

The Mothman Prophecies Starring Richard Gere, Laura Linney, Will Patton, Debra Messing Directed by Mark Pellington Years ago I visited friends in Kittanning, Pennsylvania, and I was driving across a bridge that seemed very familiar to me, even though I'd never been in the town before.  My friend with me told me that this was the bridge where they filmed "The Mothman Prophecies," which I had seen a few weeks prior, and I was really surprised because I had never at that point been to a place that was actually filmed for a movie.  After re-watching it now, I remember that bridge and realized that I was more excited about accidentally being there than the movie itself, which really hasn't held up well, despite the strong performances. John Klein (Richard Gere) and his wife Mary (Debra Messing) just bought a new house when Mary witnesses a mysterious moth-like creature while they're driving, and crash.  She ends up passing away from a brain tumor, leaving J...

Worst2First:  My Top Ten Virus Films With everything happening in the world today, I figured it's a good a time as any to showcase my personal top ten virus films.  These films won't focus on zombies (although some have variations of the classic monsters), but rather more on pandemics and epidemics that don't spawn the living dead. **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS** #10  Carriers Basing itself around the Avian Flu, "Carriers" centers on a group of friends who try desperately to follow the rules to not become infected by the deadly disease as they traverse the country in search of supplies.  The film focuses heavily on peoples' fears of a virus and how we interact with each other when we don't know what'll happen, and features a strong cast including Chris Pine, Lou Taylor Pucci, Piper Perabo and Emily Van Camp. #9  Children of Men Taking place twenty years after a mysterious illness left women unable to ha...

The Day the Earth Stood Still Starring Michael Rennie, Patricia Neal, Billy Gray, Lock Martin Directed by Robert Wise The 1950s were a unique time for cinema, in that it incorporated numerous science-fiction films that have gone on to attain not just cult status, but endearing films that have been hailed by critics and earned the title of "classic."  Films like "War of the Worlds," "The Thing From Another World," "It Came From Outer Space," "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea," and "Creature From the Black Lagoon" are still continuously watched and praised today, along with Robert Wise's "The Day the Earth Stood Still," a film that incorporated Cold War fears and Christ-typology wrapped in a different kind of alien invasion film. When an unidentified flying object is seen over Earth, the entire world goes into panic, especially when it lands in Washington, D.C.  Soon Klaatu (Michael Rennie) and his robot G...

Onward Starring Tom Holland, Chris Pratt, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Octavia Spencer Directed by Dan Scanlon Leave it to Pixar to give animated characters truly humanistic depth and to weave a beautiful, heartfelt story that'll hit you in the feels.  From the loss of a spouse, loss of youthful innocence, or even the heights of new love, Pixar never ceases to provide the waterworks.  "Onward" continues that tradition, and this is an extremely personal tale woven by incorporating both the magic of yore and the modern of yeet, a story that pretty much anyone with a pulse can get behind: what would you do for one more day with a parent who's passed on? In this world, brothers Ian (Tom Holland) and Barley (Chris Pratt) Lightfoot are blue elves who live in a post-magic world, where the former desires of learning hard magic was abandoned for simplistic modern conveniences, and there's almost no real magic left in the world.  Ian just turned 16, and struggles with ...

The Machinist Starring Christian Bale, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Aitana Sanchez-Gijon, John Sharian Directed by Brad Anderson The "unholy Trinity" of personal psychological trauma includes "Pi," "Fight Club," and "The Machinist."  All three films feature a main character who's struggling through personal trauma that's deeply affected how they see the world, and the impact of their past mistakes that've come back to haunt them.  They're films that shine a light on mental illness and the often unspoken manner in which we deal with our memories that we wish would just disappear, but they never do. Trevor Eznik (Christian Bale) is a machinist who has had a very rough year - in fact, he hasn't slept in 365 days.  He doesn't eat, and he's been reduced to almost a hundred pounds, a body that's the visible representation of his inner anemic state.  He doesn't have any friends, his co-workers think he's str...

The Way Back Starring Ben Affleck, Al Madrigal, Michaela Watkins, Janina Gavankar Directed by Gavin O'Connor Typically when a film advertises things like "from the director of" or "from the producer of," it's a trick to draw audiences in when they know a film won't be as good as the aforementioned productions, but hope you rely on your nostalgia and love for them to see what's next on the pike.  Sometimes, however, it's to advance the narrative that a certain director or producer is amazing at his craft, and will deliver another solid outing.  "The Way Back" advertised "from the director of 'The Accountant,' 'Warrior,' and 'Miracle,'" and I was debating which side the film would fall on - and fortunately it's the latter, as Gavin O'Connor again gives a stirring, powerful sports film thanks to one of Ben Affleck's best performances. Jack Cunningham (Ben Affleck) is plagued with is...

Impractical Jokers: The Movie Starring Brian "Q" Quinn, Joe Gatto, James "Murr" Murray, Sal Vulcano Directed by Chris Henchy It's not uncommon for a television series to transcend to the big screen to offer something that's longer, bigger, and oftentimes uncut (looking at you "South Park") because they don't have the restraints of television and are able to fully explore the possibilities of their shows.  One example of this is 2007's "The Simpsons Movie," which is basically a very elongated episode of the classic animated series, but also included moments that were not suitable for television.  The movie even opened with a self-defecating moment as the family is watching "The Itchy & Scratchy Movie" at the theater, and Homer stands up and says, "I can't believe we're paying to see something we get on TV for free.  If you ask me, everybody in this theater is a giant sucker, especially YOU!...

Ferris Bueller's Day Off Starring Matthew Broderick, Alan Ruck, Mia Sara, Jeffrey Jones Directed by John Hughes The coming-of-age comedy age of the 1980s belonged almost singularly to director/writer John Hughes, who gifted the world with classics such as "Sixteen Candles," "The Breakfast Club," "Weird Science," and "Ferris Bueller's Day Off."  He somehow captured the essence of being a teenager living in an 80s world, and all the fears, insecurities, highs,and lows of it all.  "Ferris Bueller" achieves a rarity in film, especially compared to today's day and age - it's a wholly innocent, light-hearted film with an important life message delivered by a modern-day sage who simply desires to skip a day of school and give his friend a memory that will last a lifetime. Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) is the most popular kid at school, someone who is beloved by every demographic - except the high-strung prin...

The Invisible Man Starring Elisabeth Moss, Aldis Hodge, Storm Reid, Oliver Jackson-Cohen Directed by Leigh Whannell Back in 2017, Universal had planned their own cinematic universe called Dark Universe, where it would bring back their beloved creatures of old - The Mummy, Dracula, The Invisible Man, The Wolfman, and so on - but after the disastrous tanking of the Tom Cruise-led "The Mummy," that idea was rightfully scrapped.  It's against this backdrop that horror maestro Leigh Whannell ("Saw," "Insidious," "Upgrade") decided to bring the beloved H.G. Wells-pennedThe Invisible Man to the big screen on his own, not making it a direct copy of the 1897 novel, but rather making it modern and applicable to the #metoo era.  While he succeeded in delivering a thrilling, female-empowering film, the movie itself suffered from a haphazard script that has plot holes big enough to drive a semi through several times over. Cecilia Kass (Elisab...

Fantasy Island Starring Michael Pena, Lucy Hale, Maggie Q, Austin Stowell Directed by Jeff Wadlow The classic television series of old have found a resurgence lately, with the likes of "Hawaii Five-O," "MacGuyver," and "Magnum P.I." getting reboots on the small screen, while the big screen has been eyeing certain properties as well, including the oft-forgotten 1977-1984 series "Fantasy Island."  I don't really remember ever seeing an episode, but I do remember the premise: a group of strangers arrive on a mysterious island run by Mr. Roarke who grants them their ultimate fantasy - and in actuality the only thing I really do remember is the small Chinese man named Tattoo call out "the plane boss, the plane!" every time it arrives.  I don't remember it being an actual horror series, but Blumhouse picked it up so of course they would turn it into an horror adventure movie - and make it light on both the horror and advent...