JoeMama's Movie Reviews

Worst2First:  My Top Ten Airplane Films Personally, I'm not big on heights, I can't even stand on most ladders without freaking out.  I've flown a few times, but it's not my favorite mode of transportation.  Part of my fear has to do with some of these films that highlight the use of airplanes. Here are my top ten airplane films, worst2first... **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS** #10 Snakes on a Plane There are some movies out there that are so bad they're good.  That's the case with "Snakes on a Plane," a film that shouldn't make any sense on the outside, yet it's something truly enjoyable and funny to watch.  Samuel L. Jackson stars as an FBI agent tasked to protect a trial witness on his way to Los Angeles when a terrorist unleashes hundreds of snakes on the plane in hopes of silencing the witness.  What ensues is Jackson in his element - all his glorious F-bombs - and a totally farcical adventure that needs to be seen to b...

Logan Lucky Starring Channing Tatum, Adam Driver, Daniel Craig, Riley Keough Directed by Steven Soderbergh The Story: Lowly West Virginian construction worker Jimmy Logan (Channing Tatum) has just been fired from his job for having a pre-existing condition involving an injured knee he got while playing football.  He needs to find a way to support his young daughter, so he plans on robbing the Charlotte Motor Speedway because his last job was there and he knows there will be some easy access points to gain the money spent at concessions.  He enlists his brother, Clyde (Adam Driver), who lost his hand in Iraq, and together they bring in convicted explosives expert Joe Bang (Daniel Craig), who is incarcerated. Jimmy hatches a plan with Clyde to bust Joe out of prison to commit the crime, and return him to prison before they even knew he was gone.  They also bring in their younger sister Mellie (Riley Keough), along with Joe's brothers, to pull off the caper....

The Hitman's Bodyguard Starring Ryan Reynolds, Samuel L. Jackson, Gary Oldman, Salma Hayek Directed by Patrick Hughes The Story: After losing his triple A rated executive protection agency, Michael Bryce (Ryan Reynolds) is brought in by Interpol to assist in bringing ruthless hitman Darius Kinkaid (Samuel L. Jackson) to the International Court of Justice to testify against Belarus President Vladislav Dukhovich (Gary Oldman).  His testimony is the only thing preventing Dukhovich from being a free man, and he's sent out all his troops to silence Kincaid for good.  Meanwhile, his equally fierce wife Sonia (Salma Hayek) remains in prison and refuses to help the police find her husband.  On the road and on the run, the two men with polar opposite views of life have to work together to make it out alive - unless they kill each other first. The Synopsis: The buddy cop comedy has been a staple of films for decades.  "48 Hours," "Bad Boys," "Ride ...

Atomic Blonde Starring Charlize Theron, James McAvoy, Sofia Boutella, John Goodman Directed by David Leitch The Story: In the waning days of the Berlin Wall, MI6 agent Lorraine Broughton (Charlize Theron) is sent to Germany to find files known as "the list" that contains the names of all the undercover operatives that has been stolen by the KGB.  While there, she meets contact British agent David Percival (James McAvoy) and French agent Delphine Lasalle (Sofia Boutella), and works with them to get the list back - albeit in vastly different ways. It seems as soon as she sets foot in Berlin, her cover gets blown and she comes into contact with several agents out to kill her, and she must also protect a man called Sunglass (Eddie Marsan) who had stolen the list but lost it, yet committed it to memory.  Lorraine finds out that someone is a double agent, and learns she can't trust anyone while she searches for the list. The Synopsis: There's a few female a...

Worst2First:  My Top Ten B-Rated Films Let's face it, not all movies can be "The Shawshank Redemption" or "The Godfather," and that's alright.  Some nights we want a thick, juicy, high-priced steak from a nationally known steakhouse, and other nights we want a Big Mac.  Thankfully there are some B-rated films out there that can be watched and re-watched not for its Oscar-caliber acting or effects, but simply due to its outlandish nature that draws us to watch it again and again. Here are my personal top ten B-rated films, worst2first. **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS** #10 Iron Sky In 1945, Nazis found a way to get to the moon, and they set up a base on the dark side of the moon, waiting for the moment they can gain power again on Earth.  That premise alone allows admittance to this list, but it's the over-the-top campy acting (including having Sarah Palin as President), surprisingly decent effects for a direct-to-DVD movie, and just...

Worst2First:  My Top Ten Political Dramas The political climate is as heated as ever, and for anyone who thinks politics is boring is gravely mistaken.  Hence why Hollywood has been making political dramas since the inception of cinema, and here are my personal top ten political dramas, worst2first. **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS** #10 Miss Sloane You'd never think a film about a lobbyist who goes against the gun industry as something exciting or intriguing, but thanks to Jessica Chastain it's both of those things and more.  Chastain delivers a once-in-a-lifetime performance as the steely, no-holds-barred, win at any cost Elizabeth Sloane, a lobbyist who joins a small, ragtag group of people who back a law that imposes regulations on firearms.  This causes her to get some very powerful enemies, and how she maneuvers through is a true sight to behold. #9 Milk Winning two Oscars (including Best Actor), "Milk," directed by Gus Va...

The Big Sick Starring Kumail Nanjiani, Zoe Kazan, Holly Hunter, Ray Romano Directed by Michael Showalter The Story: Kumail (Kumail Nanjiani) is a Pakistani comedian living in Chicago, trying to make ends meet by driving for Uber, when he's unintentionally heckled at a comedy club by Emily (Zoe Kazan).  The electricity between the two is immediately electric, and they begin a relationship - although neither one admits to it.  Kumail is hesitant because his parents are devout Muslims and want him to get involved in an arranged marriage with a good Pakistani girl, while Emily has issues with trust after a bitter divorce. All this changes when Emily comes down with a potentially life-threatening illness, and Kumail meets her parents - the timid, humorous Terry (Ray Romano) and the tough, no-nonsense Beth (Holly Hunter).  As the three deal with Emily's illness in their own different ways, it slowly brings them together but also threatens to tear them apart, as Em...

Annabelle: Creation Starring Stephanie Sigman, Talitha Bateman, Lulu Wilson, Miranda Otto Directed by David F. Sanberg The Story: Set in the 40s or 50s, devout couple Sam (Anthony LaPaglia) and Esther (Miranda Otto) are living a peaceful life with their young daughter Annabelle (Samara Lee), when tragedy strikes and Annabelle is killed.  Twelve years later, Sam invites nun Sister Charlotte (Stephanie Sigman) and a small group of orphan girls to live at the house. Janice (Talitha Bateman) suffers from polio and is the physically weakest girl, and is immediately attacked by a supernatural force that haunts the house, and specifically a creepy looking doll.  The demon wants her soul, and she lives in fear, only her friend Linda (Lulu Wilson) believes her.  As the evil spirit grows stronger, its pull becomes tighter on Janice and threatens to overtake her very soul. The Synopsis: "Annabelle: Creation" is the fourth film in "The Conjuring" universe, and ...

Worst2First:  My Top Ten Post Apocalyptic Films As the classic R.E.M. song goes: "It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine."  Hollywood loves a post apocalyptic film, because people are naturally afraid of what could happen in the event of a global catastrophe. What happens after the world changes? Here are my top ten post apocalyptic films, worst2first... **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS!** #10 The Day After Tomorrow What would happen if global warming was real?  This is basically the question answered in Roland Emmerich's end-of-the-world epic "The Day After Tomorrow."  Starring Dennis Quaid, Jake Gyllenhaal, Emmy Rossum and Sela Ward, the film deals with a cataclysmic weather event that ushers in a new ice age, and is filled with exciting action and suspense, but very little scientific accuracy. #9   The Road Based off the Pulitzer-Prize winning novel by Cormac McCarthy, "The Road" stars ...