JoeMama's Movie Reviews

The Secret Agent Starring Wagner Moura, Carlos Francisco, Tania Maria, Roberio Diogenes Directed by Kieber Mendonca Filho Some movies out there lead you by the hand in the direction they want you to go, while others craft an eloquent, subdued, sweeping story on its own terms and leaves it up to you to traverse the journey yourself. "The Secret Agent" is one such film, a sweeping, poignant, deeply character-driven epic set during the military dictatorship of Brazil in 1977, and one man's journey to bring his mother's legacy to life, reunite with his son, and also has a mysterious past that threatens to end his life. Armando Solimoes (Wagner Moura) arrives in Recife, the capital city of Pernambuco, Brazil and meets up with his contact, the elderly Dona Sebastiana (Tania Maria) where he stays in her complex with other political dissidents hiding from their pasts. She calls him "Marcelo" to hide his identity, and gets him a job at the city's identification c...

 Worst2First:  My Most Anticipated Films of Spring 2026 Leading up to what cinemas consider summer (which runs from May to August as opposed to June to August), theaters are going to be popping during the two spring months of March and April! From sequels to horror films and some exciting original content, there's something for everyone to see on the big screen in March and April. So here are the ten films I'm most excited to see in March and April of 2026... **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS** **DATES ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE** #10 Lee Cronin's The Mummy April 17 Back in 2017, Universal tried to re-vitalize its classic monsters with Tom Cruise's "The Mummy" and the result was nothing short of disastrous. It killed the entire universe with one movie, and the idea of a mummy was put back in its cinematic sarcophagus. Now, "Evil Dead Rise" director Lee Cronin has opened that sarcophagus with his own modern day rendition of "The Mummy," and while i...

Scream 7 Starring Neve Campbell, Isabel May, Joel McHale, Sam Rechner Directed by Kevin Williamson There's been movies marred in production hell, consisting of behind-the-scenes stories that would make some actual movies blush. "Scream 7" is one such troubled production. Radio Silence was slated to return to direct after they brought the franchise back from the dead in "Scream" ("Scream 5") and "Scream VI," and both Melissa Barrera and Jenna Ortega were set to reprise their roles, becoming the new faces of the franchise. In November 2023 Barrera was fired when she spoke out against the genocide in Gaza, and the next day Ortega left the production (depending on who you talk to, it's either because of loyalty to Barrera, scheduling conflicts, or the fact that Radio Silence wasn't actually returning due to scheduling conflicts in filming "Abigail"). Bent on striking while the iron was hot, the producers panicked and brought bac...

I Can Only Imagine 2 Starring John Michael Finley, Milo Ventimiglia, Sammy Dell, Trace Adkins Directed by Andrew Erwin & Brent McCorkle Music has the power to transform us and reach our innermost being, touching areas that remained locked through other means. Music is used in all types of situations - musicians rouse up millions of fans at concerts to jump, shout and dance; meditative music soothes our overthinking minds; even cults use chants to lull their followers into believing what they're told to; churches also use music to usher in the presence of God to the congregation (or, for those who are unbelievers, use music to manipulate a sense of other-worldliness). Music brings back memories and unites us through different countries, ages, and ethnicities. It's a beautiful thing, and Christian music is the music that touches the soul more than others. MercyMe is one of Christian music's most well-known bands, and its lead singer Bart Millard wrote "I Can Only Ima...

Cold Storage Starring Georgina Campbell, Joe Keery, Lesley Manville, Liam Neeson Directed by Jonny Campbell B-rated horror is a fantastic subgenre for anyone who wants to see a horror movie but not be scared by it. These films generally center around a creature or unstoppable force that everyday people come into contact with, giving a sense of urgency and hopelessness that blends well into the comedy. Roger Corman was a director best known for films like this, and "Cold Storage" is a modern day b-rated horror movie that doesn't take itself seriously, letting our guards down to enjoy the ride and serve as a decent introduction to horror for anyone too afraid to dip their toes into the more horrific. After the NASA space station Skylab crashed to Earth in 1979, scientists searched diligently for the remains, but something was left behind: a fungus that spreads quickly and, once it infects people, causes them to explode after spreading. Robert Quinn (Liam Neeson) and Trini R...

Crime 101 Starring Chris Hemsworth, Mark Ruffalo, Halle Berry, Barry Keoghan Directed by Bart Layton We're all connected through invisible threads that we don't see, but there's a knowledge deep down that we can't deny. As much as we try to be individual and different, there's always a sameness at the center, uniting us in deeper ways, even if we never meet one another. A thief, a detective, and an insurance broker find themselves tied together in this phantom thread in the excellent "Crime 101" that hearkens back to iconic classics like "Heat," "Thief," and as mentioned in the movie, "Bullitt." An action caper that allows the characters to breathe and become fully developed, it's got some of the best actors in the business today that honors their skills and pays reverence to the source material. Mike Davis (Chris Hemsworth) is a Los Angeles jewel thief who has a M.O. - he's never violent, and his capers all occur near...

Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die   Starring Sam Rockwell, Haley Lu Richardson, Juno Temple, Zazie Beetz Directed by Gore Verbinski We've been warned time and again through movies about the dangers of Artificial Intelligence, yet it seems we haven't learned that lesson. "Terminator" taught us the Skynet will eventually lead to the rise of the machines, and now we're inundated with deepfake videos and doctored photos done by A.I. that directs our way of thinking in the world of politics. We see fake trailers online and think they're real. We hear voices from the dead that make it seem like they're still alive. A.I. is slowly taking over the world, and unfortunately we won't have anyone from the future coming back to warn us before it's too late - not like the hapless heroes in "Pirates of the Caribbean" director Gore Verbinski's original work "Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die." At a small diner in Los Angeles, an unnamed m...

Whistle Starring Dafne Keen, Sophie Nelisse, Sky Yang, Jhaleil Swaby Directed by Corin Hardy The horror cinematic landscape is littered with the corpses of films that center on a group of teenagers who are picked off one-by-one by a mysterious curse or entity, and most of them have fallen into obscurity. "Whistle" is going to be another one of those ill-fated films, a movie so formulaic, simplistic and by-the-books you'll forget it as you get into your car to drive home. That's not to say there's no redeeming qualities, but those qualities are very few and far between - ultimately, this is just another generic film with mediocre performances overlayed by unique if not overly CGI kills. Chrys Willet (Dafne Keen) is attending a new school after tragic events in her hometown, and is living with her cousin Rel Taylor (Sky Yang), a loner nerd who pines for pretty girl Grace Browning (Ali Skovbye) who's dating basketball star Dean Jackson (Jhaleil Swaby). At her fir...

Shelter Starring Jason Statham, Bodhi Rae Breathnach, Bill Nighy, Naomi Ackie Directed by Ric Roman Waugh Every year has events that you know are coming - your birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, the Super Bowl, and a Jason Statham-led action film that teeters the line of being decent and dull. 2023's "Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre" was forgettable. 2024's "The Beekeeper" was one of his better outings and has earned a sequel for 2027. Last year's "A Working Man" falls somewhere in-between. "Shelter," sadly, is the worst of these middle-of-the-road films, a movie that relies heavily on tropes that it doesn't have a chance to form a cohesive story. Michael Mason (Jason Statham) is a former government assassin living a peaceful, lonely life with his dog at an abandoned lighthouse, and is only visited by young Jessie (Bodhi Rae Breathnach) and her uncle to deliver supplies, but he never speaks to them. One day Jessie confronts him ...

Solo Mio Starring Kevin James, Nicole Grimaudo, Alyson Hannigan, Kim Coates Directed by Chuck Kinnane & Dan Kinnane Valentine's Day often has movies that are extremely mediocre but serves to scratch the itch of couples looking for something to see on the big screen. 2026's big movie is "Wuthering Heights," but there's a slew of lackluster romantic comedies that men will inevitably have to sit through because their girlfriends want to. "Solo Mio" is one such movie - a basic, vanilla, unmemorable, bland movie that's nowhere near to being good but also nowhere near to being terrible, resulting in something even worse: a forgettable movie that no one will remember. Matt Taylor (Kevin James) is an art teacher who falls for fellow teacher Heather (Julie Ann Emery), and the two get engaged and go to Rome to get married. However, on their wedding day Heather gets cold feet and leaves Matt at the altar, leaving him to go solo on a duo honeymoon package, d...

The Strangers: Chapter 3 Starring Madelaine Petsch, Gabriel Basso, Ema Horvath, Richard Brake Directed by Renny Harlin "Does there have to be a why?" That question is asked in "The Strangers: Chapter 3," but it's also a question one should ask director Renny Harlin. Does there have to be a "why" he decided to remake a classic 2008 thriller into three movies that strips any excitement, mystery, or horror the original possessed? Does there have to be a "why" in elongating a simple story into three chapters that makes it feel extremely tedious, drawn out, and pointless? Does there have to be a "why" is there a script that's so bare bones it barely fits one movie, let alone three? Does there have to be a "why" you would subject viewers to this type of dull, lifeless monotony...three times over? The answer is "no," and fortunately, thankfully, this three-chapter saga is finally over and ends with a whimper instead...

Dracula Starring Caleb Landry Jones, Christoph Waltz, Zoe Bleu, Matilda De Angelis Directed by Luc Besson By now everyone knows the story of Dracula, from Bram Stoker's iconic 1897 novel based on the real Vlad the Impaler, a ruthless ruler who impaled the heads of his victims on pikes. Dracula is a vampire who murders and turns others into vampires to do his bidding, and is the most well-known of them all - so much so that in the last five years there's been four Dracula-based movies. Much like the zombie genre, it might be time to put Dracula back in his coffin for a few decades, especially after Luc Besson's abysmal version that basically is the Temu version of the iconic Francis Ford Coppola's "Dracula." Prince Vladimir of Wallachia (Caleb Landry Jones) and his wife Elisabeta (Zoe Bleu) are living the life of luxury in his castle when his land comes under attack by the Ottomans, and in the ensuing battle Elisabeta is murdered. Vladimir renounces his belief ...

Iron Lung Starring Mark Fischbach, Caroline Rose Kaplan, Troy Baker, Elsie Lovelock Directed by Mark Fischbach Very rarely is there a movie I go into totally blind - no reviews, no trailers, no synopsis, no information whatsoever. "Iron Lung" is one such film: a movie that all I knew of was the behind-the-scenes work that was done to get it finished, along with a mysterious movie poster that I, for some reason, thought was a werewolf (I have no idea why). I also knew it was based on a video game that I never heard of, but after seeing the movie I looked into it and it seems like a "Five Nights at Freddy's" style game - one location, one person, looking through pictures and traversing an unrelenting landscape in a submarine. Not knowing anything about the game served as a detriment for me, however, as those who knew the game really liked the movie while I found myself confused and somewhat bored with the proceedings, but it doesn't take away from the monument...

Send Help Starring Rachel McAdams, Dylan O'Brien, Edyll Ismail, Xavier Samuel Directed by Sam Raimi Have you ever had that one boss you couldn't stand? The one who constantly gaslights you, puts your down, and critiques your work above and beyond others? Who's favoritism is so glaringly obvious it makes you see red as you get passed up for opportunities that you deserve and are more qualified for over their friends? Then "Send Help" is just the movie for you - where a mild-mannered, meek, unassuming yet highly intelligent and capable woman finds herself under the thumb of an oppressive, younger boss until the tables are turned, resulting in a gleefully delicious power swing filled with all the bells and whistles you'd find in a Sam Raimi-directed film. Linda Liddle (Rachel McAdams) has worked in the Planning and Strategy department of Preston Strategic Solutions for seven years, and has earned the respect of its founder. Yet after he dies and he passes control...