JoeMama's Movie Reviews

  Dolly Starring Fabianne Therese, Seann William Scott, Ethan Suplee, Max the Impaler Directed by Rod Blackhurst In the Xochimilco canals of Mexico City is a famous, creepy doll graveyard of sorts - decaying mutilated dolls hanging from trees by the thousands, and it's a popular tourist spot. When I first saw the trailer for "Dolly," I was hoping it'd be a movie set in that location, but that hope was soon dashed when I saw the main villain and the backwoodsy setting, I didn't have high expectations. While it still delivered a decent story with great practical effects, it's nothing worth writing home about - but since it was done on a micro-budget and was an original idea, I have mad respect for it getting made.  While on a trip to a secluded wooded mountain for a relaxing hike, couple Macy (Fabianne Therese) and Chase (Seann William Scott) come into contact with a lot of porcelain dolls hiding out in the middle of the woods. That's creepy enough, but then...

Toy Story 5 Starring Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, Joan Cusack, Greta Lee Directed by Andrew Stanton The "Toy Story" franchise is a rarity when it comes to cinema, considering their epic Rotten Tomatoes scores. The first three films earned 100%, 100%, and 98%, and served as an amazing trilogy for anyone who grew up with the antics of Woody, Buzz, Jessie and their friends. If they were children in 1995, by 2010 they were ready to leave for college, as Andy did at the end of the third movie, moving on from childhood toys and giving strong nostalgic feelings for them. Essentially, it was a perfect trilogy. Then "Toy Story 4" came out in 2019, and while it still earned high praise (97%), it served more like an epilogue to the trilogy - not as memorable or impactful, but still joyous to see them again. Now, with "Toy Story 5," there seems to be signs of decline as it "only" scored a 93%, which is still something most movies would die to have, but its becoming...

Pressure Starring Andrew Scott, Brendan Fraser, Kerry Condon, Chris Messina Directed by Anthony Maras I've always been fascinated with the weather, and how it impacts our day-to-day lives. When it's cold and snowy, I don't want to go out, but when its sunny and warm, I don't mind it. If there's some major storms coming, I don't want to travel far, but if it's a clear day I don't mind driving miles away. It's also a fascinating thing to study, because weathermen are well known for being wrong more often than right, due to the unpredictability of weather. Imagine how it was in the 1940s, before we had all these different radar systems that accurately predict weather days before it happened - and imagine how significant weather was during World War II, as the Allied forces planned their most dangerous mission yet, and one that could turn the tide of the war - as long as the weather followed suit. In June 1944, the Allied forces are planning Operation Ov...

The Death of Robin Hood Starring Hugh Jackman, Jodie Comer, Bill Skarsgard, Faith Delaney Directed by Michael Sarnoski Americans in particular know the tale of Robin Hood: an antihero who robs from the rich and gives to the poor, the leader of his jovial Merry Men, living in Sherwood Forrest and going against the tyrannical Sheriff of Nottingham. There's been numerous movies that focus on this legend, and most of them aren't that good - the last one being the Taron Egerton-led "Robin Hood" in 2018 that was a box office and critical bomb. It seems that all the stories have been told, and no one really cared about the hero that's existed in English literature since 1377. However, what if everything we know about Robin Hood was a lie? "Pig" and "A Quiet Place: Day One" director Michael Sarnoski wrote his own story about Robin Hood - based on an anonymous writer's work  Robin Hood's Death  written sometime in the 17th Century, and this movi...

Leviticus Starring Joe Bird, Stacy Clausen, Mia Wasikowska, Jeremy Blewitt Directed by Adrian Chiarella Leviticus 18:22 states: "Do not have sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman; that is detestable." It's no surprise why first-time director Adrian Chiarella chose to name his first horror movie "Leviticus" because it a visual representation of this verse in the modern era, where radical right-wing Christian Nationalists use this verse like it's the only gospel truth in order to condemn and vilify the LGBTQ community. To make anyone going through this feel like they're wrong, wicked, vile and detestable, making them hate themselves simply for who they want to love. In a sense, although our main characters are hunted down by a demonic-like spirit only they can see, the main villains in this movie are the unfeeling, overly-religious townspeople and family members who've forced them to travel such dark roads when they didn't need to. N...

Stop! That! Train! Starring Ginger Minj, Jujubee, Brooke Lynn Hytes, RuPaul Charles Directed by Adam Shankman Spoof comedies are making a comeback in cinema thanks to the surprise success of 2025's remake of "The Naked Gun" with Liam Neeson playing the son of the man the great Leslie Nielsen played in the 80s. That year ended with the equally hilarious "Fackham Hall" and then this year brought back the mother of all 2000s spoofs, "Scary Movie 6" to rousing success. Now "Stop! That! Train!" continues to chug ahead with the laughs that doesn't tread new territory, but it doesn't need to. Best friends Tess (Ginger Minj) and DeeDee (Jujubee) work as train stewardesses for a failing train line, but wish to work on the glamorous Glamazonian Express and get their shot when two of their stewardesses don't show up for work, so they disguise themselves and find themselves on board. Unfortunately, they don't know they're heading into...