JoeMama's Movie Reviews

  The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent Starring Nicolas Cage, Pedro Pascal, Sharon Horgan, Tiffany Haddish Directed by Tom Gormican At one point in time, Nicolas Cage was the most sought-after action actor in Hollywood, as well as being one of the most respected dramatic actors of the time. He even earned an Academy Award for his performance in "Leaving Las Vegas," as well as several other accolades. Appearing in memorable films like "The Rock," "Con Air," and "Face/Off," Cage had everything going for him, until they didn't. Soon Cage was relegated to the likes of fellow former Oscar winner Cuba Gooding Jr. and appeared in several direct-to-home media lackluster films, yet also gained a cult following due to his erratic and eccentric, over-the-top behavior in his films. Hidden gems like "Mandy," "Color Out of Space," and "Mom and Dad" littered the direct-home landscape, and it seemed that his major big-screen ...

  The Northman Starring Alexander Skarsgard, Anya Taylor-Joy, Ethan Hawke, Nicole Kidman Directed by Robert Eggers Robert Eggers is one of this generation's most powerful directorial voices, with only three films under his belt thus far. "The Witch" single-handedly introduced the concept of "elevated" horror. "The Lighthouse" was a visual and visceral wonder featuring two actors giving the performances of their stellar careers. "The Northman" is his first "major" blockbuster, a film longer than anything he's done before, and while showcasing moments of his eccentric brilliance, sometimes falls under the typical epic pattern of intense fighting sequences mixed with few dramatic moments but somehow not able to fully stick the landing due to a surprisingly lack of characterization. Young Amelth (Oscar Novak) idolizes his father, King Aruvandill (Ethan Hawke), and when he comes home successful from an oversea conquest, the two embar...

  Worst2First: My Most Anticipated Films of Summer 2022 As it happens every year, summer brings out the blockbusters and the family-friendly films in droves, with numerous franchise-continuing movies, Marvel products, horror, and even some interesting smaller films hitting the big screen, and here are the ten I'm most excited to see. **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS** **DATES ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE** #10 The Black Phone June 24 One of those films that was moved a few times due to the pandemic and then other unknown reasons, "The Black Phone" will finally hit theaters in June, and looks to be a thrilling kidnapping adventure from the director of "Sinister," which was scientifically proven to be the scariest movie ever made (although I disagree greatly). The film stars Ethan Hawke as a man who's kidnapped and murdered children. The latest child he's kidnapped, however, has some help to escape - the ghosts of the kids that Hawke's character killed before, who...

  Birdemic: Shock and Terror Starring Alan Bagh, Whitney Moore, Adam Sessa, Catherine Batcha Directed by James Nguyen Whenever someone is making a film, it's their main goal to make sure as many people imaginable can see it, in order to turn a profit and to make their movie one that'll exist in the annals of history. Conversely, some make films in order to tell an important message and it doesn't matter how many people see it, depending on how passionate they are about their product. There's been countless memorable films out there that've withstood the test of time: "The Godfather Part II," "Citizen Kane," "Casablanca," "The Lord of the Rings" and "Halloween" are staples of their genres, and people still think fondly of them to this day: they're memorable for all the right reasons, and have rightfully earned their place in the history of cinema. Then there's films like "Catwoman," "Plan 9 From...

  Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore Starring Eddie Redmayne, Jude Law, Mads Mikkelsen, Ezra Miller Directed by David Yates When it comes to the wizarding world of Harry Potter, I consider myself a pureblood Muggle: I never read the books, only saw each movie once, and honestly don't understand the overall appeal. Yet, as I say, "to each their own," and I can appreciate a film that's not particularly my cup of tea. I rather enjoyed all the "Harry Potter" movies (although if you gave me a scene and asked which "Harry Potter" film it was in, I legitimately couldn't tell you). Thinking the "Harry Potter" universe was over with...well...the final "Harry Potter" movie, I felt like I could close that chapter - but then "Fantastic Beasts" came along, a prequel series centering around magizoologist Newt Scamander and taking place seventy years before young Harry became a wizard. The first film was fun, fascinating...

 Everything Everywhere All at Once Starring Michelle Yeoh, Stephanie Hsu, Ke Huy Quan, Jamie Lee Curtis Directed by Daniels When I first saw the trailer for "Everything Everywhere All at Once," my only thought was: "want, need, give!" I had to endure several months of torturous anticipation, all the while hearing about how groundbreaking, revolutionary, and downright original the film was, garnering praise practically universally. So when I finally was able to see it, my expectations were already sky-high, and it only seemed natural that my expectations would be diminished after viewing it. Somehow, some way, by some happenstance, not only were my lofty expectations met, but the film blew them out of the ceiling. Out of the countless films I've seen in my life, this is one that will resonate with me, marinating in my very essence for a long time to come, and ultimately it was more than a film - it was a marvelous experience. Evelyn Wang (Michelle Yeoh) is an agi...

Dog Starring Channing Tatum, Jane Adams, Kevin Nash, O'orianka Kilcher Directed by Reid Carolin & Channing Tatum The 1980s saw a resurgence of the traditional man and man's best friend buddy comedy romp, the two most notable being "K-9" and "Turner & Hooch." Films about man and his lovable four-legged companion traversing the country interacting with all types of people and getting into hilarious shenanigans is as typical as they come, and "Dog" is one of the more modern-day films that hold to this tried and true method. In many ways it's reminiscent of the 80s comedies, which in a surprising way is actually refreshing in today's crowded cinematic world. Where you have world-ending films, superhero epic battles, and Oscar-worthy dramatic performances, it's a welcome thing to see a simple, bare-bones story about a (not-so) epic journey that feels completely grounded in reality. U.S. Army Ranger Jackson Briggs (Channing Tatum) has...