JoeMama's Movie Reviews

The Rhythm Section Starring Blake Lively, Jude Law, Sterling K. Brown, Raza Jaffrey Directed by Reed Morano In the "American Dad" episode "The 42-Year-Old Virgin," it's revealed that Stan Smith - then known as the CIA's most lethal killer - never really killed anyone before, but each perpetrator he encountered ended up dead due to other means other than Smith's hand, showing his ineptitude with killing.  I mention this because that was what was running through my mind while watching "The Rhythm Section" - a by-the-books average-woman-turned-assassin that's highly predictable, bland, stale, and without any charm or charisma.  Most importantly, the assassin is totally incompetent and would've easily been disposed of in her first mission, but of course that would've meant the film would've ended in about an hour so they had to showcase her bumbling through hit after hit. It's been three years since Stephanie Patric...

Birds of Prey and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn Starring Margot Robbie, Jurnee Smollett-Bell, Rosie Perez, Mary Elizabeth Winstead Directed by Cathy Yan There's certain roles that seem tailor-made for the actors who have played them, and you can't imagine anyone else in that role.  Harrison Ford as Indiana Jones.  Sigourney Weaver as Ripley.  Hugh Jackman as Wolverine.  Margot Robbie as Harley Quinn.  The last one is the most recent, as Robbie portrayed the lovable villain in 2016's abysmal "Suicide Squad," but was never really to officially let loose and release her inner Quinn until now, and it's well worth the wait.  This is what happens when you allow a female-driven superhero team-up film to star women, be directed by a woman, written by a woman, and produced (by Robbie herself) by a woman - a fun, action-packed comedic adventure with deep characterization and unique visuals that show the film knew what it was doing the en...

92nd Academy Awards Predictions Every year I make my Oscar predictions, and mostly every year I get most wrong (mostly the ones I don't know much about).  This year I was able to see all the pictures nominated for the biggest categories, so we'll see if I fare any better this year. BEST DOCUMENTARY FEATURE American Factory The Cave The Edge of Democracy For Sama Honeyland I haven't seen any of these films (I'm surprised "Apollo 11" wasn't nominated), but from what I've read about them, "For Sama" sounds like the perfect Oscar bait winner, plus it received a lot of BAFTA nominations.  BEST DOCUMENTARY SHORT SUBJECT In the Absence Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone Life Overtakes Me St. Louis Superman Walk Run Cha-Cha Again, I haven't seen these, but from the title alone (plus it deals with girls learning to read, write, and skate in Afghanistan), I'd go with "Learning to Skateboard in...

Rocky Balboa Starring Sylvester Stallone, Burt Young, Milo Ventimiglia, Geraldine Hughes Directed by Sylvester Stallone The Story: It's been thirty years since underdog Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone) entered the ring and made history, and now he's living a retired life in his hometown of Philadelphia, where he's still hailed as a hero to most.  He runs a restaurant he founded called Adrian in honor of his wife, who passed away four years ago.  On the anniversary of her death, he travels around her old haunts with her brother Paulie (Burt Young), and he still holds close to his son Robert (Milo Ventimiglia), who now wants to make a name for himself in the business world but is still stuck in Rocky's shadow. One night at the old bar he used to frequent, he runs into Marie (Geraldine Hughes), who, as a little girl, Rocky helped one day.  The two rekindle their friendship and Rocky continues to face the issue of being a has-been, especially when a computer...

The Gentlemen Starring Matthew McConaughey, Charlie Hunnam, Henry Golding, Hugh Grant Directed by Guy Ritchie What Martin Scorsese is to American gangster films, Guy Ritchie is to British gangster films.  He burst into the scene with two tremendous films that spotlight his unique storytelling style in "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" and "Snatch," which remains his magnum opus.  He followed that one-two punch with two additional fantastic pieces of work: "Revolver" and "RocknRolla" (I'm bypassing his God-awful "Swept Away" as a regrettable decision he made so he can feature his then-wife Madonna - or maybe she forced it out of him), and he really cemented himself as a unique voice in a crowded room due to his fast-paced nature, quick edits, and snippy, intelligent dialogue. It's when he started doing other peoples' work that he started to falter in his directing style.  While he co-wrote his early work, he ...

Major Theatrical Releases February 2020 Here are the major theatrical film releases in February 2020... **THERE WILL BE NO SPOILERS** **DATES ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE** Birds of Prey: And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn February 7 The DCEU is really looking for something to grab hold and claim as a victory, and recently they haven't had much success in that department, especially the much maligned (yet somehow Oscar winning) "Suicide Squad," whose only valuable asset was Margot Robbie's beloved Harley Quinn.  So of course she gets her own spinoff film, and I'm cautiously optimistic about it.  The trailer looks bonkers (much like Harley herself), as she splits from the Joker and forms an all-female team to rescue a young girl from the hands of Ewan McGregor's Black Mask.  The film features other comic heroes including Black Canary, Huntress, and Renee Montoya, and it looks like it'll be a very...

Gretel & Hansel Starring Sophia Lillis, Sam Leakey, Alice Krige, Jessica De Gouw Directed by Oz Perkins We're living in a new age of female empowerment, heightened by the strength of the #metoo movement, proving that women have just as much to offer as men in different facets of society - and Hollywood is leading the charge, but not always in the right direction.  Last year was maligned by two specific flops centering around female empowerment - "Charlie's Angels" and "Black Christmas," films that both highlighted the power of women, but failed due to their excessive, beat-you-over-the-head flagrant use of it ("Black Christmas" was more guilty of that than "Charlie's Angels," which was a perfectly fine film but received backlash over Elizabeth Banks's statements as to why it failed).  So when word came that there was going to be a darker, gritter version of the classic Grimm's fairy tale "Hansel and Gretel...