JoeMama's Movie Reviews

San Andreas Starring Dwayne Johnson, Carla Gugino, Alexandra Daddario, Paul Giamatti Directed by Brad Peyton Synopsis: Ray Gaines (Dwayne Johnson) is a Los Angeles Fire Department helicopter-rescue pilot, and is going through a divorce with his wife Emma (Carla Gugino), and prepares to take his daughter Blake (Alexandra Daddario) to college.  Life isn't ideal, but not necessarily bad.  Meanwhile, Caltech seismologist Lawrence Hayes (Paul Giamatti) discovers that he can predict earthquakes, and knows that an earthquake beyond comprehension is about to occur in the Los Angeles/San Francisco area, which could possibly shift the San Andreas fault and cause unprecedented devastation. Of course, he's right, and the earthquake hits.  Ray manages to rescue Emma from the rooftop of a crumbling building, and they fly to San Francisco to rescue Blake, but as the earthquakes continue, she finds herself in deeper peril and faces the possibility that she might not be re...

The Walking Deceased Starring Tim Ogletree, Joey Oblesby, Dave Sheridan, Troy Ogletree Directed by Scott Dow Synopsis: In a lame mixture of "The Walking Dead," "Zombieland" and "Warm Bodies," a group of dim-witted, moronic survivors try to survive in a world run by zombies. Review: Quick and simple here.  Parody movies were done brilliantly in the 80s and 90s ("Airplane," "The Naked Gun"), but unfortunately there's no good parody writers nowadays, and this one is as terrible as they come. Summary: Avoid.  Nuff said. My Rating: D-

[REC]4: Apocalypse Starring Manuela Velasco, Paco Manzanedo, Hector Colome, Ishmael Fritschi Directed by Jaume Balaguero Synopsis: Television reporter Angela (Manuela Velasco) endured the terrors of the virus that was released in the apartment complex in the first two films, and she is finally rescued by a team of GEOs, led by Guzman (Paco Manzanedo).  The two are taken to a ship under quarantine to make sure they're clean of the virus, but there's a deadly secret that hides in the bottom pits of the boat, and Angela learns that her ordeal is far from over. Review: The "[REC]" series has been a mixed blessing.  All are extremely well-done, but the story changes from film to film.  In one film the virus is simply a zombie-like virus that turns people into bloodthirsty monsters.  In another film, the virus is a religious disease created by the devil himself.  In the third film, there's no continuity whatsoever with the first two, as it takes place in...

The Mirror Starring Jemma Dallender, Joshua Dickinson, Nate Fallows Directed by Ed Boase Synopsis: Roommates Jemma (Jemma Dallender), Matt (Joshua Dickinson) and Steve (Nate Fallows) decide to purchase a supposedly haunted mirror off eBay and film it to submit it to the James Randi Educational Foundation One Million Dollar Paranormal Challenge.  As they film, Matt begins to exhibit strange behaviors, which culminates to deadly consequences for all three roommates. Review: Horror movies are the only genre of film where you can really produce a film with a little budget and have it be somewhat decent.  Unfortunately, "The Mirror" isn't one of them. The premise is interesting - albeit almost a total ripoff of the much more superior "Oculus" - with a supposedly cursed mirror, but even the mirror itself looks like something you'd pick up at your nearest Target.  It's not old or ancient, but rather really modern and, well, a mirror. As one o...

The Sacrament Starring AJ Bowen, Joe Swanberg, Gene Jones, Kentucker Audley Directed by Ti West Synopsis: Patrick's (Kentucker Audley) sister, Caroline (Amy Seimetz) gave up living in New York and moved to an unknown country to live in a religious commune led by Father (Gene Jones), and he's worried for her safety.  Together with reporter Sam (AJ Bowen) and cameraman Jake (Joe Swanberg), they travel to the isolated commune to film what is going on.  Upon arrival, it seems like a nice, albeit different, way of living.  However, as the men spend more time there, they discover the deadly secret behind Eden Parish, and that their loving Father isn't as loving as he appears. Review: Ti West is one of today's most talented horror directors, with films such as "The Inkeepers" and "The House of the Devil," he delivers a different type of horror, one that harkens back to the 70s style where there's a slow buildup to a cataclysmic close, ins...

Still Alice Starring Julianne Moore, Alec Baldwin, Kristen Stewart, Kate Bosworth Directed by Richard Glatzer & Wash Westmoreland Synopsis: Alice Howland (Julianne Moore) is a linguistics professor at Columbia University.  She celebrates her 50th birthday with her husband John (Alec Baldwin), her son Tom (Hunter Parrish) and daughter Anna (Kate Bosworth).  Her youngest doughter, Lydia (Kristen Stewart) is living on the other side of the country. During a lecture, Alice forgets a word.  Then as she's jogging around campus, she forgets where she is.  She starts seeing a neurologist, who diagnoses her with early onset familial Alzheimer's Disease.  As she struggles to maintain her memories, Alice's condition slowly deteriorates, and her family is forced to make difficult decisions, as Alice does as well. Review: Directors Richard Glatzer (in his final director role before his untimely passing from ALS) and Wash Westmoreland deliver a stunningl...

American Graffiti Starring Richard Dreyfuss, Ron Howard, Paul Le Mat, Charles Martin Smith Directed by George Lucas Synopsis: In small town America in 1962, a group of high school friends come together for one final night together before they go their separate ways.  Enjoying the warm California night, they cruise the streets in their classic cars, listen to some of the best music ever created, and encounter love, loss, nostalgia and fears of the future. Steve (Ron Howard) and his longtime girlfriend Laurie (Cindy Williams) face the prospects of a long-distance relationship.  Curt (Richard Dreyfuss) goes on the search of a mysterious, beautiful woman while dealing with his fears of leaving his friends behind.  John (Paul Le Mat) cruises the strip and picks up Carol (Mackenzie Phillips), a girl way too young for him, and is forced to babysit her as he races against his nemesis Bob Falfa (Harrison Ford).   Terry (Charles Martin Smith), the nerd of the group...