Psycho Killer

Psycho Killer
Starring Georgina Campbell, James Preston Rogers, Malcolm McDowell, Logan Miller
Directed by Gavin Polone

Sometimes a trailer comes out that makes a movie so intriguing you can't wait to see it, and once you do you want to give whoever edited that trailer an Academy Award for making a more compelling two-minute video rather than a feature-length film. "Psycho Killer" is one of those movies, who's trailer makes it seem like it'll be an intense cat-and-mouse game akin to "The Silence of the Lambs" and "Longlegs," but instead it turns out to be a wannabe Lifetime movie with more blood.

Jane Archer (Georgina Campbell) is a police officer who witnesses her fellow police officer husband's murder at the hands of the Satanic Slasher (James Preston Rogers) during a seemingly routine pullover. Enraged by the seemingly inept ability of the police to track down the elusive killer who's murdered countless people across the country, Jane takes it upon herself to investigate and track down the man himself, who is planning an epic conclusion to his own Satanic story that'll show the world the true power of Satan.

I'm still in shock this movie was written by Andrew Kevin Walker, who also wrote the epic "Se7en," as this seems written by a coked-up high schooler who thinks he practices Satanism but in reality is just a poser. Taking advantage of the Satanic Panic of the 80s (which really isn't applicable today), "Psycho Killer" should've been a slam dunk horror hit that would've been compared to the likes of the aforementioned "Lambs" and "Longlegs," but instead will just be an asterisk of cinematic history where people talk about the worst films they've ever seen. 

What makes this movie so bad? There's so much to unpack. First is the titular psycho killer himself, the Satanic Slasher. The name itself is so generic it matches the character to a T - a faceless wannabe Michael Myers who dons a stupid gas mask in hopes of coming across as terrifying but instead more humorous, who's voice is definitely not the actor's own. When he talks he sounds like Bane and Darth Vader had both been smoking ten packs of cigarettes a day for twenty years, and when it's supposed to come off as menacing it's more gut-rolling hilarious than anything. There's nothing inherently scary about the antagonist, other than his desire to be an Art the Clown copycat with how he kills his victims in gruesome fashion (there's even a scene where he dispatches a number of people at once, and not even then could I be bothered to be impressed).

Then there's Georgina Campbell, who made a name for herself with Zach Cregger's excellent debut film "Barbarian." Here she plays Officer Jane Archer, who's only character traits is that she's married to a cop that was killed and she's pregnant. Other than that there's no character development, and she's no Clarice Starling. While she does manage to track down the Slasher to a hotel, instead of waiting for backup, she decides to go in herself, and you probably know how well that turns out. While the other officers are stock characters of law enforcement in horror movies (basically inept), Jane is even more inept in her Wile E. Coyote-like desire to catch the Slasher Road Runner. Throw in a comedic laugh track in the background and you honestly wouldn't even know the difference.

Then there's the conclusion and the reason why the Slasher does what he does. It doesn't make sense, and there's no possible way the plan could ever work out not just in a logical level, but even in the illogical movie premise. It's downright silly and stupid, leading to an even more annoying finale that makes it seem like they'd want to make a sequel, but judging by the reviews and lack of eyeballs, fortunately that will never happen.

The Score: D-