The Threesome

The Threesome
Starring Zoey Deutch, Jonah Hauer-King, Ruby Cruz, Jaboukie Young-White
Directed by Chad Hartigan

With a titillating title like "The Threesome" you'd expect at least some sort of romantic intrigue or sexual tension, but instead it's a very watered-down version of the title that doesn't explicitly show anything at all exciting, and if it weren't for the foul language it would've been a PG-13 snoozer. What's worse is that the movie circles itself over and over like Ouroboros and shows that, while this concept has some legs, it would've been better as a short film rather than a short film stretched way too thin.

Connor Blake (Jonah Hauer-King) is a nice guy who's still crushing on his friend Olivia Capitano (Zoey Deutch), but she's currently involved with a married man and seems to only be her natural sarcastic self around Connor. One day at the place she works at his friend Greg (Jaboukie Young-White) mentions that there's a girl who got stood up, so he goes to talk to her. Olivia, jealous of the girl getting Connor's attention, butts in. However, there's chemistry between Connor, Olivia, and Jenny (Ruby Cruz), and the three spend the night together. Later on, Connor is shocked to find that both Olivia and Jenny are pregnant, and sets out to do the right thing, but as he fakes a relationship with Jenny to appease her overly-religious parents, Olivia grows deep emotional feelings for Connor and vice versa, threatening their budding relationship due to his fake one with Jenny.

The concept for "The Threesome" had some promise, even if it's a bit disingenuous. The consequences of a one-night threesome tryst results in both women getting pregnant (wondering how rare that would actually be, it seems to be that's rather impossible to do if you're not planning on it) and how the man handles it is something that could've been thought-provoking and deep, but instead the movie meanders its way to its sluggish ending with generic tropes and caricatures of its characters as their strained relationship moves in circles again and again.

It's sad because Zoey Deutch, Ruby Cruz and Jonah Hauer-King are great actors who give it their all, but the script is so paper thin they got nowhere to go. Deutch has the most to work with in Olivia, who's sarcastic outer shell hides a sensitive, caring individual inside. She is involved with a married man because she wants to feel something, and those feelings go for Connor in deep ways. She loves him but also repels him, proving herself too afraid to really open up and be vulnerable. While this is a highlight, it's also the film's detriment. The movie goes around and around with Connor and Olivia - they flirt, kiss, express real emotional feelings, then Olivia backs off, resents herself, they come back together, and the cycle repeats over and over. Again, if it was a short movie, it would've worked - but here it just becomes tedious and monotonous. 

Jonah Hauer-King doesn't have anywhere to go in the story but play the nice guy Connor who wants to do right with both Olivia and Jenny, and in the end that's all the performance is - nice. He doesn't really get anything deep to work with as he serves as Olivia's infatuation and protecting Jenny against her religious parents, and doesn't really delve any deeper into his character. At least Ruby Cruz has some wiggle room as she struggles between her religion and her pregnancy and hiding the truth from her family, but even that goes nowhere. 

Offering a truly watered-down version of its title, "The Threesome" is a boring, predictable, cyclical movie that wears itself thin early on and only gets thinner as the movie slugs along.

The Score: C-